


take a byte

by badfriend



Series: very self-indulgent halloween specials [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Crack, F/M, Gender Neutral, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, M/M, Other, Post-Time Skip, Reader-Insert, Vampires, and god said let there be rich pro-gamer lesbians, and maybe it is, and there were rich pro-gamer lesbians, i swear i write crack like it's a personality trait
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:40:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26835337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badfriend/pseuds/badfriend
Summary: you reunite with kenma at a work party that isn't yours, drink a little, dance a little, make a wager, and then a little somethin' somethin'.rated T for language and mild suggestive themes.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Reader
Series: very self-indulgent halloween specials [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1957453
Kudos: 18





	take a byte

**Author's Note:**

> there's a very short scene in which the reader is harassed about midway through the fic (like right after reader reunites with kenma). please skip if you feel uncomfortable.
> 
> also, the pacing of this made me want to cry. i haven't written anything non-academic related in so long but i'm back.

Roppongi Hills, Minato District. 10:42PM.

You should've seen it coming as soon as you stepped out of the cab and instantly saw Roppongi Hills Residence sticking out like a sore thumb. These co-workers were not just rich, they were rich RICH.

Akane has to clasp a hand over her mouth to prevent herself from letting out a string of curse words that would give Alisa a migraine, because you see, Akane is still fourteen in Alisa's head. 

"Which level was it again?" Akane asks, and there's no answer from you who's busy fixing your cat ear headband and Alisa who is too preoccupied with her phone to answer. It is only when Akane changes the tone of her voice that you apologise and mumble the floor number through the bobby pins tucked in between your lips.

"Thank you," she says again, and dusts the pleats of her old, bloodied cheerleader skirt. Though the blood was fake, the uniform was very much real. Akane had been head cheerleader back in Nekoma High School and it occurred to her the night before that she could just repurpose it and go as a vengeful cheerleader. She already had half the persona down anyway. 

Alisa, on the other hand, was dressed up as Sadako from _Ringu_ and the black wig in contrast with her carefully painted face could very well put the film's makeup artists to shame.

"Ok, I'm gonna call Jiji and Sayaka to buzz us up," Akane announces, and moves to the side to make the phone call.

Jiji and Sayaka were two pro-gamers in the e-sports world who were more famously known as the lesbian power couple in their industry. They went viral for a bit on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter for simply just exiting their company's building and again when someone made a compilation of their iconic competition day outfits. They were also the ones who invited Alisa to their Halloween 'work' party, which meant that you had to attend alongside her, because wherever Alisa went, you went--being her personal manager and all. You didn't know how all these people knew each other, but Alisa had told you something about models knowing practically everyone in every industry and that it was actually your job to network across different demographics, not hers. And though her invite was initially under the guise of personal development, the reality was that you wanted to go because Kenma was going. 

Now, if anyone asks you why you like Kenma, you would simply tell them something about how cute he looks when he's all determined, or even just something about just how _himself_ he was at all times; no fakery or anything. That, and the way simply hanging out with Kenma a bit throughout high school and college had always put a smile on your face.

A few seconds later and you're finally being buzzed up from the elevator to the floor you were supposed to be on and you can hear the end of ‘Disturbia’ by Rihanna fading into The Weeknd before you even get to the front door that's blocked by one security guard looking bored as all hell.

"Oh my god, they have auto-lock?" You start whispering, feeling slightly agitated and out of place.

"My building just installed a keypad system this year," Akane whisper-shouts back. "Just how much rent are they paying?"

"About 1,040,000 yen," Alisa answers for her.

"They pay _how_ much!?" You choke out, and the security guard glances at you wearily as you hand out your ID card.

"That's a lot of zeros," Akanae murmurs in agreement. But before you can all mourn your losses in life, the door swings open and the security guard doesn't even get through Alisa and Akane's ID cards because you're all being hauled inside and into the arms of two girls dressed in matching black and white (Playboy) bunny suits.

"Alisa!!" One of them squeals.

"Jiji!! You look so cute," Alisa replies as they let go of everyone locked in the group hug. You and Akane exchange surprised but happy grins at the display of affection, because these girls just seemed so genuinely nice and it's been a while since you got such good vibes from meeting someone for the first time.

"Naw, really? You look so good though."

"You look sexy, babe," Sayaka interrupts and pecks Jiji on the cheek, the lipstick stain red and vibrant across her pink, flustered cheek. Sayaka grins, satisfied at her girlfriend's reaction and then her eyes drift towards your outfit and you remember that you really just showed up to someone else's semi-elite work party dressed in black satin as a sexy... cat.

"You must be Alisa's manager!" Jiji says, interrupting the beginning of your self-deprecating thoughts. You nod and are kind of flustered at the looks you can see people giving you already. "I love the cat ears by the way," she adds, and then gives you a wink, "very kinky."

You feel your cheeks go red at the compliment and struggle to contain the bit of glee wrapped inside you.

"Stop embarrassing them, oh my god." Jiji playfully slaps Sayaka's shoulder while you see that Akane and Alisa have moved to the side to giggle at how flustered you were getting from all their attention.

"N-no, thank you. I feel a bit more confident now," you say earnestly.

"Aww, you are too sweet for your own good. Now, come on, let's go get you all some drinks!" Jiji says and grabs your hand. 

You're finally being ushered around the apartment in an extremely quick tour that starts from the wide windows of the balcony at the far end of the lounge-room-turned-dance-floor to what you think is the sexiest view of the city skyline that you have ever seen. You have to dodge the incoming pop-outs of notorious slasher flick serial killers with minimal screeching from your end, but the smoke machine releasing billowing heaps of fog smoke makes it hard not to scream when anything remotely animate jumps out at you. Alisa and Akane spill into a photobooth in one of the guest bedrooms and you tell them you'll join after you walk around some more and drink up the atmosphere.

"Ok, go 'drink up the atmosphere'," Akane snorts, "and say 'hi' to Kenma for me when you see him!"

The playlist that is blasting through the speakers is going through so many songs from your teenage years that it makes you laugh and bop along to the old school tunes as you down your first two drinks of the evening. You can't seem to find Kenma yet, but it doesn't sour your mood because you're feeling buzzed and slightly delirious. It had been a long week, and an even longer time since you last drank, so who can blame you really? You're just very happy to be there with good food, good music, and even better company. 

Alisa and Akane finally come out of the photobooth scream-laughing at the photos they took and show you the pictures of them pulling ridiculous faces. You can't help but join them in cackling at the stark difference between each of their public and private images and ask them to send copies to the group chat immediately. Alisa then props her elbow on your shoulder and though she already towers over a lot of people without heels, yourself included, she decided to wear heels tonight, and you loved her for it.

"Hey look who finally appeared." You turn to look in the direction Alisa was gesturing towards.

"DRACULA?" You gasp out and surely enough, Kenma turns around and he's dolled up in a three-piece suit with a silky black and red cape draped over him. When Kenma actually registers what you’re wearing, his head snaps back so fast that it makes you a bit concerned.

Maybe he couldn't hear you over the music? Or see you through the smoke? He seems glued to the spot, so you call out his name again, a bit louder this time, and he has no choice but to look directly at you when you come over.

"Why are you here?" Kenma says, covering the lower half of his burning face with the cup he's holding.

"Alisa invited me as her plus one!" You state rather proudly. The alcohol is clearly making you more enthusiastic than usual but you can't seem to care about that right now because Kenma was finally here! Kenma grumbles something about thinking that you were going to be his plus one, to which you answer by leaning forward to look into his eyes that are darting everywhere else besides your outfit. "Sorry, kitten. Alisa asked me first."

Kenma's cheeks warm at the endearment, making you smile triumphantly.

"It's been years, darling," you continue in the poshest voice you can muster, "and you don't look a day over twenty!" The statement goes over Kenma's head when you burst out laughing at your ridiculous accent but he finds himself hiding a smile behind his cup again and waits for you to recover from your laughing fit. You pretend to wipe a tear, then say in a serious voice, "No, seriously though, Kenma. What's your skincare routine?"

A voice the both of you choose not to recognise interrupts the reunion and you spin around to see another former classmate—one who's infamous for being a complete dickhead—walk up to the two of you.

"Hey," he smirks, and you can feel your stomach churn. "I remember when your ringtone was the Gundam opening back in middle school and now you're tellin' me you look like _THIS_!"

"Are you fucking for real?" You mutter under your breath.

"Huh, what did you say? Speak up!"

You clench your knuckles before getting out your extra pair of cat ears and thrusting it under his nose as some sort of makeshift weapon.

"Was that supposed to be a compliment, you tasteless prick!? Watching anime or doing anything remotely geeky doesn't have anything to do with somebody's appearance, so back off!" The guy's jaw opens to retort but you cut him off by making a chopping motion out in the direction of where Kenma is standing.

"Kenma here always played video games back then and he was cute as well, and now he plays games for a living and he's still as pretty as ever. Riddle me THAT!"

It feels like the party went silent for a while, like in the movies where everybody is standing around watching a train wreck of a conversation happen before them for some reason. Fom the corner of your eye, you can also see Alisa and Akane sipping their drinks and trying not to laugh at how shrill your voice got at the end of your rant. But everybody else is ignoring you for the most part, and some are just plain snorting at the shock on the other guy's face.

You grab Kenma's hand and quickly drag him to the game room where people are setting up Mario Kart for those who want to chill for the rest of the party. Kenma's face blanches once you find a spot on the floor to sit down. "Why did you bring me into this?"

"I don't know, I panicked!" You admit. "I had a plan of attack in my head to crush his ego by shoving my credentials and other achievements in his face because he cares so much about that shit. You know I hate people like that! People who think that just because they're rich, smart, or famous, they're entitled to everything. God, why is he even here?" You look Kenma up and down and then add, "And why are you dressed up as Count Dracula!"

"Because this is who I am," Kenma says bluntly.

"Huh?"

"I wanted to blend in, not stand out like y—" He looks briefly at your sheer stockings that have ridden up a bit, revealing a lot more of your upper thigh, and feels his heart about to explode. "A-and, tonight is the perfect night for me to look like this. It's All-Hallows Eve after all."

"Fine, fine." You sigh, pretending to find his answer satisfactory. But the liquid courage in you makes you want to continue talking. "We could've matched you know. You and me wearing cat ear headbands. It would've been so cute." You pout, and it makes you look even more delectable.

Kenma shakes off the thought, and blushes when you catch him turning away from practically glaring at you. You furrow your eyebrows at him. "You know you're acting more evasive than usual," you comment. Kenma chooses to remain quiet, his eyes trained on the game playing out in front of him.

That's when you come up with the most brilliant idea (that you had brewing since the moment you put your costume on actually). You feel yourself sitting more upright as you gently tug at Kenma's cape.

"I want to play a game," you announce, not unlike Jigsaw from the _Saw_ franchise. "If you lose, you have to wear the cat ears I brought."

Kenma sighs. Of course it was that. "And if I win?"

The grin you’re wearing splits across your face. "Whatever you want."

"If I win, I want you to never bring up anything cat-related ever again."

You groan, clutching your chest theatrically. "So, I can't talk about how I want to try some sexy cat eyeliner looks on those gorgeous, feline eyelids of yours?" 

Instead of giving you an answer, Kenma stands up and moves to where the other partygoers are and tells them that you're paying the next round of Mario Kart.

The game ends with Kenma losing on purpose because who was he kidding? He _wants_ to match with you—even if he has to wear the stupid cat ears. But only for photo proof, then he's taking the damn thing off.

You drag him to the bathroom that's decorated tastefully with a long floor mirror lined with golden specks that stand out against the blood-red walls. There are some old touches that would look out of place anywhere else, but in here it somehow all fits.

After snapping many photos with Kenma in your matching cat ear headbands, the both of you sit on the edge of the pristine bathtub, exhausted from your abrupt mini photoshoot. 

"Now to show Kuro," you giggle but then Kenma's fingers graze the top of yours and you look up to see him shaking his head. 

"Please don't," he whispers.

"It's only for my eyes only then?" You perk up, clutching both your hands together hopefully and hopelessly misreading the situation. 

Kenma looks between your glittering eyes and your hands clasped together and has to remember to breathe in order not to combust into flames. He nods, scared that he'll lose the way you're looking at him if he looks away for even a brief moment. 

You instinctively wrap your arms tightly around him but Kenma stiffens and you back away immediately. "Oh shit, sorry, Kenma." You look down at the tiles and remember where you are and who you're with. When Kenma doesn't reply straight away, you get up, not wanting to look at his face in fear of seeing his reaction. You'd rather just pretend this never happened. 

"I'm really sorry," you apologise once again, not knowing what else you could say without feeling your heart sink.

Your hand is on the door knob when Kenma calls out your name, and the way it slips off his tongue makes you put a little hopeful twirl in your step; like this is one of your daydreams, not real life.

You face him, breathless. And he looks at you, warm but calculating all the same. 

How many steps would it take to close the gap between you?

You feel your body leaning forward. Neck in full view, collarbone exposed.

When he parts his lips, you catch a glimpse of something sharp that look like fangs, and they don't look like a costume prop at all. 

Your breath hitches in your throat at the revelation.

"Kenma?" You whisper, but it's barely audible with the music drowning out your voice from the other side of the wall. It doesn't matter anyway, because Kenma only sees the shape of your lips and the way it forms his name.

"Can I?"

"Yes."

Kenma blinks. Once. Twice. And then, finally. He pounces. 

**Author's Note:**

> ...meow


End file.
